BELSER MOVIE REVIEWS: "THEY WANT DICK DICKSTER".
Nursing a nasty hangover? No fear. The Belser is here to help you relieve that ailment. My bag of tricks includes some witty wisdom and interesting insight on the movie review tip. This is a special one for BELSER MOVIE REVIEWS. Mainly because this is an independent film, not a major release like I usually do. Now, last night, I was privileged to be invited to the premiere of a new film titled 'They Want Dick Dickster'. NO, it's not a porno. Well, not really. More on that in a moment. HERE'S THE STORY: Shot documentary- style, this movie follows film director Dick Dickster (Robert Ray Shafer), a washed- up alcoholic has-been (actually, 'never-was' is more accurate). His only claim to fame is a really bad cult classic horror flick he made years earlier called (appropriately) "Cult of Doom". Since that movie, he fell into a depression and has basically burned every bridge he's ever established. Dick is now universally despised, both in and out of the industry. However, a young USC film student ( and fan of Cult of Doom) offers to shot a documentary /comeback project about the life of Dickster. Also, in a stroke of luck, he gets an offer to do a porno remade of his most famous movie, titled "Cult of Poon" (not making that up). Between film crews, loan sharks, strippers, midgets and booze, get ready to look into the crazy world of Dick Dickster. ACTING AND WRITING: Acting wise, Robert Ray Shafer (THE OFFICE, the PSYCHO COP movies) really stole the show as Dick Dickster. Shafer turned a miserable, egotistical, selfish lush with no redeeming qualities into a very likable character. It reminded me a lot of Billy Bob Thornton in 'BAD SANTA'. You actually say to yourself, "Why do I like this guy?" but he kept you engaged. I dig that. The supporting cast was quite colorful as well. Among them are Tim Abell as a loan shark/screenwriter and Calvin Tenner as a buff Army Ranger with a gay midget boyfriend. The real stand out was Tim Russ (STAR TREK: VOYAGER) as Sammy Davas Jr, Dickster's scheming agent and his only friend (despite the fact Dick owes him money). On the sexier side of the game, we have Melanie Good as Dickster's stripper ex-wife, Jan Broberg as the producer of Cult of Poon( and an ex porn star), and a number of young stars including Frankie Cullen and Tasha Halevi. I really loved the documentary aspect of it. Especially, the talking head interviews from people like Richard Grieco, Gerald Webb, director Fred Ray and others about how much they hate Dickster. Humor wise, this movie is brought to you by the same guys that brought you movies like 3-HEADED SHARK ATTACK and the SHARKNADO movies for The Asylum, so it's crazy funny. Lots of language, sex jokes, fart jokes, vomiting and some nudity. My kind of movie. FINAL WORD: Would I watch this again? My answer: HELL YES!! I loved this movie from start to finish. Kudos to director/writer Chris Ray, producer Gerald Webb and writer/producer/ star Robert Ray Shafer. Considering the fact these guys made a feature length film in 6 DAYS TIME, this movie is quite an accomplishment.Be on the look for Deinstitutionalized Films who made this flick. Check it out when it comes out on Netflix or on DVD. This movie GETS the Belser Seal of Approval.